Does this sound okay? (story)?

Yes, there are several sentence structure mistakes, but yes, it sounds interesting (if a little cliche, but people like cliche so that's fine.) The only thing that gives me pause is her final choice: between her own life or writing a story? Even if she could get the story out after her death somehow, would anyone really choose to die for a magazine article? You'll really have to play up the rivalry between her and Foils (cute name) if I am to believe she'd risk her life for a story.